Hey God...Let's Talk

So, is there a right way to pray?  As you can probably imagine, I get asked to pray at meals and on holidays when folks who otherwise wouldn't think twice about saying a prayer suddenly become self conscious about their piety just because a pastor is in the room.  It's not that I mind doing it.  I can...so I do.  But I'm dismayed when other people think they can't pray...or that their not good at it - like it's a talent honed and perfected by lessons and practice.  I tried to play the clarinet once...for a half a week at music camp.  I was awful.  If you've ever tried to make music exude from a reed instrument, you know that what's more likely to be heard by your unfortunate audience is a series of squeaks and honks than real notes.  But after a couple of days at music camp I could eek out a passable version of Camptown Races or something like that.  Ok, I had a couple of lessons and practiced the notes, but just so I knew the basics.

It's kinda the same way with prayer.  It's just talking.  And most people I know do that.  Why is it that when it comes to talking to God, we get all nervous and jittery?  Part of it is that we think that prayer has to be done in a particular way - with special words in the right place - and the right kind of reverence.  My father-in-law says amazing table grace prayers...he becomes a poet complete with alliteration, rhythm, and meter.  He prays the way people used to write in the 18th and 19th centuries - sentences flowing like water over rocks in a gentle stream.  I get a little bummed when he asks me to pray at dinner only because that means I will miss his elegant and graceful prayer.  But my clunky, not very poetic prayer is just as good, right?

 There is no "right" way to pray.  There are no words that are more acceptable to God.  It shouldn't be more difficult to say thanks to God for a meal than it is to say thanks to Uncle Jim for passing the mashed potatoes.  Or if it's help from God you need, why not just say, "God, get over here and help me with this!" in the same way you'd summon your lazy teenager off the couch.  Elegant and well crafted prayers are nice.  They create a certain space of reverence and reflection.  But for talking to God, almost any words will do.

And this goes for the Lord's Prayer as well.  In my tradition we have become accustomed to two "versions" of the Lord's Prayer.  Some people call them the "traditional version" and the "contemporary version," and it's true that one is a little newer than the other, but even the so-called contemporary version is over 35 years old.  The older version uses "thy" and "who art" and "trespasses," so some people think it sounds more official.  The newer version uses the kind of language that most of us use every day...words like "your" and "sins."  Both versions are good.  Both versions get the job done.  God listens to us either way.

I would hope that we would spend more time thinking about the content of our prayer and what it's for than whether we are praying the right way or not...or whether we are good at praying.  Ultimately God wants us to stop once in a while and recognize that it's not all about us.  God would rather we stumble through a few clumsy words in an earnest and honest prayer, than put on a show of piety tour de force in a grand speech directed mostly at the people hearing us pray.

The next time somebody asks me to pray at a meal or something, I might just say this: "Why don't we all just recognize that God is here whether we ask for a blessing or not.  In our ongoing conversation and actions, let's assume that God is listening and watching and maybe even joining in!"  Amen.